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Saturday, 3 May 2014

Sanctuary in solitude

Sanctuary in solitude: Being alone doesn’t mean being lonely

I enjoy spending time on my own, contemplating my innermost thoughts. Some people I know are afraid of being by themselves, and they really shouldn’t be. Some people never get the time (or make the time) to be alone and connect with their true selves. 

I believe that solitude is not something to be afraid of, it is something to embrace. Time alone is vital to my wellbeing, or I lose a sense of who I am. 

The key to spending positive time by yourself if you are not used to it or find it a negative experience, is to fill it full of your favourite things. Be indulgent, be true to what you really want and enjoy. When we are with others we always make small compromises about what we want to do. When you are by yourself, there is no compromising. You are free to be absolutely you and please yourself properly.

My 6 tips to enjoy yourself, by yourself:

1 . Walk on the beach.

Head somewhere beautiful and unspoilt like West Wittering. Listen to the sounds of nature and feel the sand beneath your feet:

2. Indulge yourself with natural remedies

Connect with your body by using some beautiful homemade cosmetics, like this all-natural sugar scrub from Wellness Mama. My personal blend is caster sugar (softer than granulated), coconut oil, almond oil and vanilla extract (not sure on quantities, I tend to just bung it in!). Delicious!

3. Read a fiction book

I reread my favourite books all the time. I was lucky enough to visit the Vale of Blackmore in Dorset at Easter, setting for Hardy’s Tess of the D’Urbervilles. It reminded me so much of Hardy’s magical descriptions of nature. I was so inspired from the visit that immediately on arrival home I had to rummage amongst the shelves to find my battered copy:

“The traveller from the coast, who, after plodding northward for a score of miles over calcareous downs and corn-lands, suddenly reaches the verge of one of these escarpments, is surprised and delighted to behold, extended like a map beneath him, a country differing absolutely from that which he has passed through. Behind him the hills are open, the sun blazes down upon fields so large as to give an unenclosed character to the landscape, the lanes are white, the hedges low and plashed, the atmosphere colourless. Here, in the valley, the world seems to be constructed upon a smaller and more delicate scale; the fields are mere paddocks, so reduced that from this height their hedgerows appear a network of dark green threads overspreading the paler green of the grass. The atmosphere beneath is languorous, and is so tinged with azure that what artists call the middle distance partakes also of that hue, while the horizon beyond is of the deepest ultramarine. Arable lands are few and limited; with but slight exceptions the prospect is a broad rich mass of grass and trees, mantling minor hills and dales within the major. Such is the Vale of Blackmoor.” Chapter 2, Tess of the D’Urbervilles, Thomas Hardy. 

Find it free here

Discover more of Hardy’s Blackmore (or “Blackmoor”) here:

4. Read a non-fiction book

I love a self-help book, me. I’m also one of those people who gets so inspired by a good book that I have to read it into the night (and sometimes all night!) to satisfy my huge literary appetite. You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay is a wonderful way to tap into the positive about yourself, if you allow yourself the time to read and do the exercises. Highly recommended.

I’m a massive fan of Hay, hence my previous blog

Please add your recommendations for inspiring reads in the comments section below. I’m always after new fodder!

5. Cook your favourite meal, with the best quality ingredients you can afford.

When I lived in Worthing, I used to head down to the fishermen who sold their catch right off the shore. You couldn’t beat it for spanking freshness and quality and I’ve never found better. After experiencing their wonderful bass, bream and mackerel I could never go back to the supermarket fish counter. I still find it incredible that they head out in all weathers in these little dinghies. Fishermen really do the most perilous job and if I wore hats, they would be doffed in respect. Mmmmmm… fish…..

6. Be silly!!! Dance and sing around the house! Who cares when no-one can see?! You don’t need good moves, or a good voice, just let it all go! Sing it, Leo:

If you like what you have read, please share this blog and subscribe with your email! Many thanks, ChamomileTea xxx

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